Just read this, and wondered what next?
http://uk.news.yahoo.com/08032007/397/sat-nav-directs-driver-railway-0.html
I was always taught as a child, "Just because someone tells you to jump off a cliff, you don't do it"
Or in her case, do you?
Heaven forbid, if she ever bought a shotgun and tested out if it really hurts if you load it, put the barrel in your mouth and press the trigger!!
How does she drive using satnav? Does she look at the road at all times, picking up directional clues from the commentary with occasional glances at the display, or does she stare constantly at the screen and follow the instructions implicitly?
I would hope it's the former, but judging by the story it can only be the latter!
Silly arse.
Thursday, March 08, 2007
Justified?
Just heard about this, let's just hope the media don't spin this one out of proportion.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/south_yorkshire/6429569.stm
Personally speaking, if you kick off when I am dealing with you, it doesn't matter to me if you are male or female, young or old, nor does it matter if you are black, white, green or sky blue pink with yellow dots. If you are being aggressive, resisting arrest, and are SPITTING, BITING or (perish the thought) GRABBING at my GENITALS, then I WILL use as much force as I feel is required.
If you watch the footage, the officer does strike the female 5 times, and the officer's statement says that she was spitting, biting and grabbing at his genitals.
Fair enough, but with the magic of hindsight I would, in that officers position, have applied an arm bar and wrist lock (given that the female was already in a prone position on the floor), then use that technique to get the female to comply. By the officer's own admission, he was trying to inflict discomfort to get the female to comply. He just chose to use strikes instead of applying pressure.
The media are going to try and make this out to be some kind of race issue. I don't think race is the issue. I think it is a case of a very drunk individual, behaving in an anti-social manner, gets the tables turned on her and is now crying wolf and playing the race/female card.
The fact she is doing that must be very galling to all the people that have suffered real incidents of racial abuse and violence. Hopefully this facade will be seen for what it is, and the message that needs delivering will get through:
If you chose to go out and act in a drunken aggressive manner, then expect to be dealt with firmly and positively. The community at large needs to be re-assured that violent, drunken anti-social behaviour will be tackled head on, regardless of the perpetrator's sex, age, race, religion etc.
And who is footing the bill for the costs of the female's legal action, I wonder? Oh yes, the bottomless pit that is legal aid, no doubt!
What's the bet that the bobby in the middle of this will be suspended pending the inquiry, whereas the female will be free of any worry of employment discipline? (that's if she has a job in the first place!)
Come on Government, what ever happened to :
Tough On Crime, Tough On The Causes Of Crime?
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/south_yorkshire/6429569.stm
Personally speaking, if you kick off when I am dealing with you, it doesn't matter to me if you are male or female, young or old, nor does it matter if you are black, white, green or sky blue pink with yellow dots. If you are being aggressive, resisting arrest, and are SPITTING, BITING or (perish the thought) GRABBING at my GENITALS, then I WILL use as much force as I feel is required.
If you watch the footage, the officer does strike the female 5 times, and the officer's statement says that she was spitting, biting and grabbing at his genitals.
Fair enough, but with the magic of hindsight I would, in that officers position, have applied an arm bar and wrist lock (given that the female was already in a prone position on the floor), then use that technique to get the female to comply. By the officer's own admission, he was trying to inflict discomfort to get the female to comply. He just chose to use strikes instead of applying pressure.
The media are going to try and make this out to be some kind of race issue. I don't think race is the issue. I think it is a case of a very drunk individual, behaving in an anti-social manner, gets the tables turned on her and is now crying wolf and playing the race/female card.
The fact she is doing that must be very galling to all the people that have suffered real incidents of racial abuse and violence. Hopefully this facade will be seen for what it is, and the message that needs delivering will get through:
If you chose to go out and act in a drunken aggressive manner, then expect to be dealt with firmly and positively. The community at large needs to be re-assured that violent, drunken anti-social behaviour will be tackled head on, regardless of the perpetrator's sex, age, race, religion etc.
And who is footing the bill for the costs of the female's legal action, I wonder? Oh yes, the bottomless pit that is legal aid, no doubt!
What's the bet that the bobby in the middle of this will be suspended pending the inquiry, whereas the female will be free of any worry of employment discipline? (that's if she has a job in the first place!)
Come on Government, what ever happened to :
Tough On Crime, Tough On The Causes Of Crime?
Monday, March 05, 2007
Domestic violence
Contrary to what the f*cking media are currently telling you, Police do attend cases of domestic violence.
We don't shrug and sigh, 'Leave them to it, it's a domestic'
What we do, is go to the address, split up the parties involved, check on any children's welfare, and if any offences become apparent, then we lock up. EVERY TIME.
The beauty is that we DON'T need the victim to complain (although that is the best evidence), all we need is an officer to see an injury, and we can go forward with the case.
I wish I could show you a picture of the aggressor's face when they hear that the victim won't press charges, only for us to cuff them because we've seen the injuries.
Talk about having the rug pulled from under them, it's almost comical.
The sad thing is, there are thousands of decent people out there who wouldn't hurt a fly, but they remain single. The nasty, aggressive and violent ones ALWAYS seem to be able to get into relationships.
When ANYONE is convicted of spousal or familial abuse the sentence ought to include a tattoo on their forehead:
I AM A NASTY, AGGRESSIVE AND VIOLENT PERSON, NOT TO BE TRUSTED AROUND PEOPLE. DO NOT ENTER INTO A RELATIONSHIP WITH ME.
That would cure it. No questions.
Imagine the first date in the pub, "Hi, I'm Mary, you must be Dave. Hang on what's that on your forehead?" Slight pause, then, "I think I've left my bath running, got to go..........!"
Welcome to the rest of your pathetic life on your own, you pillock.
But, it won't happen. Think of the violent person's human rights. That is why there will always be domestic violence.
Or at least until we have a judiciary that will hand down no-nonsence prison sentences to these thugs. What is the point of the government and home office instructing the police to have a zero tolerance policy towards domestic violence, then not backing that up with punishment from the courts?
Sorry for the rant, it just winds me up when the media get one side of the story, then blame the police for societies ills.
We don't shrug and sigh, 'Leave them to it, it's a domestic'
What we do, is go to the address, split up the parties involved, check on any children's welfare, and if any offences become apparent, then we lock up. EVERY TIME.
The beauty is that we DON'T need the victim to complain (although that is the best evidence), all we need is an officer to see an injury, and we can go forward with the case.
I wish I could show you a picture of the aggressor's face when they hear that the victim won't press charges, only for us to cuff them because we've seen the injuries.
Talk about having the rug pulled from under them, it's almost comical.
The sad thing is, there are thousands of decent people out there who wouldn't hurt a fly, but they remain single. The nasty, aggressive and violent ones ALWAYS seem to be able to get into relationships.
When ANYONE is convicted of spousal or familial abuse the sentence ought to include a tattoo on their forehead:
I AM A NASTY, AGGRESSIVE AND VIOLENT PERSON, NOT TO BE TRUSTED AROUND PEOPLE. DO NOT ENTER INTO A RELATIONSHIP WITH ME.
That would cure it. No questions.
Imagine the first date in the pub, "Hi, I'm Mary, you must be Dave. Hang on what's that on your forehead?" Slight pause, then, "I think I've left my bath running, got to go..........!"
Welcome to the rest of your pathetic life on your own, you pillock.
But, it won't happen. Think of the violent person's human rights. That is why there will always be domestic violence.
Or at least until we have a judiciary that will hand down no-nonsence prison sentences to these thugs. What is the point of the government and home office instructing the police to have a zero tolerance policy towards domestic violence, then not backing that up with punishment from the courts?
Sorry for the rant, it just winds me up when the media get one side of the story, then blame the police for societies ills.
A nice little runaround for granny...
Not usually a fan of cars, but I do like Nissan Skyline GTRs
http://www.totb.co.uk/images/movies/rocket_ron_spin_totbii.wmv
http://www.totb.co.uk/images/movies/rocket_ron_totbii.wmv
Then Jezza has a go.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YyZUQKwxhHg&mode=related&search=
Eeeeek. What an animal.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e6nA0vh7wGg&mode=related&search=
Just to redress the balance, here's a 500hp Suzuki Hayabusa Turbo
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gpQP4v_Z0nQ&mode=related&search=
http://www.totb.co.uk/images/movies/rocket_ron_spin_totbii.wmv
http://www.totb.co.uk/images/movies/rocket_ron_totbii.wmv
Then Jezza has a go.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YyZUQKwxhHg&mode=related&search=
Eeeeek. What an animal.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e6nA0vh7wGg&mode=related&search=
Just to redress the balance, here's a 500hp Suzuki Hayabusa Turbo
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gpQP4v_Z0nQ&mode=related&search=
Sunday, March 04, 2007
The chickens.
I thought it was high time that I let you know how the chickens are doing.
They have been laying well all summer, but then again, that's their bloody job, so they should have anyway.
My cockerel, Chuck Norris, has proved he has got lead in his pencil so to speak and we got 5 chicks at the first attempt. Good cock...ahem.
Sadly, 5 and 9 makes 14, and 14 is too many for my small run. So, it was with a heavy heart and a very sharp kitchen knife that I cut the ties to 7 of the chucks (including my boy, Chuck Norris).
They have now gone to live next door.
I am going shopping in the next few days to stock up the greenhouse with tomato plants and strawberry plants. I also fancy having another go at cucumbers.
Au revoir
They have been laying well all summer, but then again, that's their bloody job, so they should have anyway.
My cockerel, Chuck Norris, has proved he has got lead in his pencil so to speak and we got 5 chicks at the first attempt. Good cock...ahem.
Sadly, 5 and 9 makes 14, and 14 is too many for my small run. So, it was with a heavy heart and a very sharp kitchen knife that I cut the ties to 7 of the chucks (including my boy, Chuck Norris).
They have now gone to live next door.
I am going shopping in the next few days to stock up the greenhouse with tomato plants and strawberry plants. I also fancy having another go at cucumbers.
Au revoir
Saturday, March 03, 2007
It's your job.
Just in case anyone thinks I don't like attending public order incidents, you're right, I don't, but it's my job to do it.
The reason I don't like them, is not because I am scared, it's because they are a massive drain on resourses. Resourses that should be deployed in other areas, catching burglars, drug dealers, car thieves, rapists, murderers and people driving whilst using their mobiles...ahem.
That's the problem. As a nation we can't have a good night out without getting shitfaced, spewing up and pissing in the street. that's all before the inevitable punch up at the end of the night.
If only we could realise we only have one life, if only we could be a little more relaxed and happy. I am afraid the punch up are here to stay as long as we have mixed pubs.
Yes, have male and female only bars and all the trouble will stop. I can personally say that during the 70's and early 80's, when there were a lot of pubs with bar rooms (men only) and lounge rooms (women and couples), there wasn't anywhere near the amount of public order incidents that there are now.
But then again, that is the 'Rose-Tinted Glasses' world that I live (lived) in, not the puke and piss on the pavement world of today, and I know what I prefer.
Au revoir
The reason I don't like them, is not because I am scared, it's because they are a massive drain on resourses. Resourses that should be deployed in other areas, catching burglars, drug dealers, car thieves, rapists, murderers and people driving whilst using their mobiles...ahem.
That's the problem. As a nation we can't have a good night out without getting shitfaced, spewing up and pissing in the street. that's all before the inevitable punch up at the end of the night.
If only we could realise we only have one life, if only we could be a little more relaxed and happy. I am afraid the punch up are here to stay as long as we have mixed pubs.
Yes, have male and female only bars and all the trouble will stop. I can personally say that during the 70's and early 80's, when there were a lot of pubs with bar rooms (men only) and lounge rooms (women and couples), there wasn't anywhere near the amount of public order incidents that there are now.
But then again, that is the 'Rose-Tinted Glasses' world that I live (lived) in, not the puke and piss on the pavement world of today, and I know what I prefer.
Au revoir
It DOES work!!!
As a Police Officer, I am issued with CS Spray. There has always been a nagging doubt whether it actually works. I know it does, I have been subjected to it, but that doesn't stop the "What if it doesn't?" scenario from being thought about.
Well I have now witnessed it personally, and I can report back from the front line that it does work. Boy, does IT work.
"Control to any Standardville patrols, there is a fight ongoing in the 'Badger's Arse' public house on the high street, reports of 15 people fighting"
"Control from Zulu X-Ray 15, show us attending, ETA 2 minutes"
We get there in under 2 minutes to find bedlam. A patrol got there before us, waded into the pub to try and split up the warring factions, and when they didn't stop, yep, out came the CS.
Now they all want to complain about over-zelous policing.
What is this bloody country coming to, when people believe that they have the right to commit violent disorder, and then complain when the police (out numbered) dish out CS in order to re-establish control?
Unfortunately, some people think they were innocent, and got a face full of CS for doing nothing.
I don't think so. Fights are ALWAYS two-sided stories. Yes, there is an aggressor, and a target. But, there are also options.
1. Walk away, and if that fails call the police.
2. Start fighting (which happened), then you only have yourself to blame when you get a face full of CS when the Police arrive and can't get you to stop scrapping.
The trouble is that our country, as a whole (a valid point, as public order is a country wide problem EVERY weekend), they don't want to walk away, they want to get involved, and when the dice doesn't fall for them, they then start bitching.
And the trouble is (for Police) they are listened to, the officers involved WILL be complained against, and have to answer to Professional Standards.
The officer's error? Getting stuck in and trying to stop the fighting. If they felt threatened or that someone would have been injured if they didn't act, then I believe they were justified in spraying.
I don't think anyone INNOCENT was sprayed, the group that was sprayed were well into a ruck and wouldn't stop, and therein lies the problem. They wouldn't walk away from the fight, they got involved, and now that someone has (for want of a better phrase) got the better of them, they don't like it.
The fact it was just one person, a female Police Officer, is like a sledgehammer to their (over-inflated) egos. What did you want, or expect, her to do, stand back and watch you all create merry hell?
The good thing for them is the CS spray's effect wears off, the bad thing (for them) is the fact that they (all 15 of the sad gits) were brought to their knees by one woman will last forever.
Go girl, go girl.
Feel the burn, feel the Oestrogen.
Ha ha, ha ha.
Au revoir
Well I have now witnessed it personally, and I can report back from the front line that it does work. Boy, does IT work.
"Control to any Standardville patrols, there is a fight ongoing in the 'Badger's Arse' public house on the high street, reports of 15 people fighting"
"Control from Zulu X-Ray 15, show us attending, ETA 2 minutes"
We get there in under 2 minutes to find bedlam. A patrol got there before us, waded into the pub to try and split up the warring factions, and when they didn't stop, yep, out came the CS.
Now they all want to complain about over-zelous policing.
What is this bloody country coming to, when people believe that they have the right to commit violent disorder, and then complain when the police (out numbered) dish out CS in order to re-establish control?
Unfortunately, some people think they were innocent, and got a face full of CS for doing nothing.
I don't think so. Fights are ALWAYS two-sided stories. Yes, there is an aggressor, and a target. But, there are also options.
1. Walk away, and if that fails call the police.
2. Start fighting (which happened), then you only have yourself to blame when you get a face full of CS when the Police arrive and can't get you to stop scrapping.
The trouble is that our country, as a whole (a valid point, as public order is a country wide problem EVERY weekend), they don't want to walk away, they want to get involved, and when the dice doesn't fall for them, they then start bitching.
And the trouble is (for Police) they are listened to, the officers involved WILL be complained against, and have to answer to Professional Standards.
The officer's error? Getting stuck in and trying to stop the fighting. If they felt threatened or that someone would have been injured if they didn't act, then I believe they were justified in spraying.
I don't think anyone INNOCENT was sprayed, the group that was sprayed were well into a ruck and wouldn't stop, and therein lies the problem. They wouldn't walk away from the fight, they got involved, and now that someone has (for want of a better phrase) got the better of them, they don't like it.
The fact it was just one person, a female Police Officer, is like a sledgehammer to their (over-inflated) egos. What did you want, or expect, her to do, stand back and watch you all create merry hell?
The good thing for them is the CS spray's effect wears off, the bad thing (for them) is the fact that they (all 15 of the sad gits) were brought to their knees by one woman will last forever.
Go girl, go girl.
Feel the burn, feel the Oestrogen.
Ha ha, ha ha.
Au revoir
Didn't see this coming.
For anyone that read this blog entry, you may recall me writing about a pissed 14 year old girl:
http://the-chicken-run.blogspot.com/2006/11/bite-yor-tongue-time.html
Well, she has now been taken into care.
And she has now begun absconding from the care home - that's a surprise.
We have just been informed that when the care home get her back from her latest disappearing act, she's being moved to another care home a few hundred miles away.
Laugh, I almost dropped my kebab into my coffee. She wouldn't listen to people and parents trying to help her, so now she has to deal with the consequences.
It might sound hard-hearted, but eventually people have to face up to their actions and take responsibility.
She has just found out the hard way.
http://the-chicken-run.blogspot.com/2006/11/bite-yor-tongue-time.html
Well, she has now been taken into care.
And she has now begun absconding from the care home - that's a surprise.
We have just been informed that when the care home get her back from her latest disappearing act, she's being moved to another care home a few hundred miles away.
Laugh, I almost dropped my kebab into my coffee. She wouldn't listen to people and parents trying to help her, so now she has to deal with the consequences.
It might sound hard-hearted, but eventually people have to face up to their actions and take responsibility.
She has just found out the hard way.
Friday, March 02, 2007
So far, so good?
Well, at the end of the first working week of the new mobile phone laws, I haven't seen anyone flouting them. But then again, I was working nights, most people I have seen driving and phoning tend to be during the day. The next few weeks will tell.
Au revoir
Au revoir
Thursday, March 01, 2007
Eat up!!
Ref. this post http://the-chicken-run.blogspot.com/2007/03/do-maths.html
More humble pie, Mr Anderson?
http://youtube.com/watch?v=n3rEykLZLGo&mode=related&search=
Sigh......
More humble pie, Mr Anderson?
http://youtube.com/watch?v=n3rEykLZLGo&mode=related&search=
Sigh......
Do the maths...
Quoting a friend of mine in the forces:
"A country that was formed about 200 years ago. Compared with just about every other civilisation in the world that makes them about 2 years old.
Who lets a 2 year old loose with a gun?"
http://youtube.com:80/watch?v=XKDzTHvKRgw
"A country that was formed about 200 years ago. Compared with just about every other civilisation in the world that makes them about 2 years old.
Who lets a 2 year old loose with a gun?"
http://youtube.com:80/watch?v=XKDzTHvKRgw
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Missing persons
http://youtube.com/watch?v=mkZhnWIRncQ
I wonder how many missing persons start off like this?
Au revoir
I wonder how many missing persons start off like this?
Au revoir
Answering the phone and night-shift.
Right, I am getting a bit pissed off. I am on nights at the moment, and the past 2 days sleep have been curtailed by some out and out pillock wanting to solve my financial worries (via some f*ckin' call centre)
Yes I am the home owner, No, I don't want to change my mortgage, yes, you have woken me up, no, sorry won't do.
I aren't the sharpest knife in the drawer, but I can hold my own. I am quite shrewd at sorting out my financial affairs, and I know for a fact that I don't conduct my business over the phone with some TW*T that keeps calling me whilst I am trying to sleep.
If I were to consider changing my mortgage (which I am ironically), it won't be with a company that gets people to ring you up on the off chance. I like appointments, face to face meetings and in-depth discussions.
I am not at my best, fiscally or emotionally, if you have just woke me up after 3 hours sleep. So if I sound a little pissed on the phone, there's a f*ckin reason.
Yes, you may record this call for future training purposes, at least someone in your company might learn that, in the real world, people that have mortgages might not be contactable during the day for a number of reasons:
WE'RE AT WORK !!! That's how we pay the mortgage, money doesn't grow on f*ckin' trees, you know!
WE'RE IN BED!! We've been at work, got home tired, gone to bed 3 hours ago and are in the middle of a really nice dream involving the Australian Ladies' Beach Volleyball Team, and their Wonderbra fitting session.
So, I appreciate it that you've got a job to do, but ringing WORKING people during the day is not the best practice.
I wonder if your company would spend as much time ringing unemployed people?
Rant over, I'm off back to bed.
Sleep tight
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
I must be having an animal day.
Possessed cat!!!
http://youtube.com/watch?v=jyPY9SmhvQU&mode=related&search=
Funny dogs
http://youtube.com/watch?v=WTKE-H3oaIo
http://youtube.com/watch?v=jyPY9SmhvQU&mode=related&search=
Funny dogs
http://youtube.com/watch?v=WTKE-H3oaIo
Cats
http://youtube.com/watch?v=pIqhUCZgwXQ
http://youtube.com/watch?v=z9dbO6SV-Dg
I need to go and put some new underwear on.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=z9dbO6SV-Dg
I need to go and put some new underwear on.
Chicken police
At last, the answer to law enforcement.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ybVb3t560oY
Laugh, I almost wet myself.
Au revoir
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ybVb3t560oY
Laugh, I almost wet myself.
Au revoir
Respect.
Had a laugh when I found this on http://www.respect.gov.uk/article.aspx?id=9198 I have posted an abridged version here and ..... ahem ..... commented a bit on it. For the full fat version visit the link above.
I found it especially funny as I wrote these 2 blog enries BEFORE I found the respect website.
http://the-chicken-run.blogspot.com/2007/02/why-not-question-statement.html
http://the-chicken-run.blogspot.com/2007/02/welcome-to-jungle.html
Word up, dis iz wot part ov respect is all abaht:
"Being a parent isn't always easy"
NO SHIT, SHERLOCK
Children don't come with an instruction manual
HOW ABOUT A REMOTE CONTROL?
"Make an effort to spend quality time together, even if it's just to go for a walk as a family, even just an hour."
RATHER THAN SADDLE THE COMMUNITY WITH YOUR PARENTAL FAILURES?
"Engage children in what you're doing, talk to your child about what's going on and ask them what they think."
TAKE THEM TO THE PUB WITH YOU, SHOW THEM ALL ABOUT KIDNEY FAILURE AND SMOKING ILLNESSES.
Praise your child. Let them know when they're doing something good, and it will encourage them to do it again.
WELL DONE FOR TERRORISING THE COMMUNITY AND SETTING FIRE TO THE BUS SHELTER, YOU MAY NOW BRING YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND HOME FOR MORE UNPROTECTED SEX.
Provide your child with engaging activities. When children have plenty of interesting things to do, they don't get bored and there are fewer problems.
HERE'S THE TELLY, THE DIAL A PIZZA NUMBER IS ON THE PAD NEAR THE PHONE, THE BEER'S IN THE FRIDGE, I CAN'T BE BOTHERED, I'M OFF TO THE PUB.
Parenting has a crucial influence on a child's behaviour
NO, YOU DON'T SAY!
"How we act around children encourages them - what we do, they see and copy."
SO, YOU'RE THE CULPRITS, I F*CKING KNEW IT!
"Rules should apply to everyone in the house - the children learn from us about things like tidying up and less swearing."
HA HA, IT JUST GETS BETTER
"Children listen to you more when you talk to them face to face instead of shouting from the other room."
OR ARE YOU JUST A TOTAL INADEQUATE THAT CAN'T EXPRESS YOURSELF? IF YOU CAN'T EXPRESS YOURSELF, HOW ABOUT NOT EXPRESSING YOUR SEXUALITY, AND NOT HAVING CHILDREN IN THE FIRST PLACE?
"Instead of shouting I ignore minor misbehaviour - it works and I am less stressed."
AND THEN MORE MAJOR MISBEHAVIOUR, AND THEN ALL BEHAVIOUR?
"I used to tell him off for silly little things, now I ignore little things unless it's going to turn into something major."
YEAH, AND NOW THEY JUST WON'T LISTEN?
"Stay calm. The calmer you are, the easier it is to calm children down."
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
Back up your instructions with appropriate consequences. Back up your words with actions such as removing a troublesome toy, withdrawing a privilege or in certain instances use a consequence such as time out.
SUCH AS? IF YOU DON'T GO TO SCHOOL YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO GET A JOB? THAT'S A BIT RICH COMING FROM SOMEONE THAT HAS SPENT THE CHILD'S LIFE ON THE DOLE.
Develop routines for your child. Routines help children learn what to do at certain times of the day, like before school or getting ready for bed.
HANG ON, ISN'T THE AGE OLD TRIED AND TESTED 'DO AS YOU F*CKING PLEASE' ROUTINE WORKING?
AU REVOIR
I found it especially funny as I wrote these 2 blog enries BEFORE I found the respect website.
http://the-chicken-run.blogspot.com/2007/02/why-not-question-statement.html
http://the-chicken-run.blogspot.com/2007/02/welcome-to-jungle.html
Word up, dis iz wot part ov respect is all abaht:
"Being a parent isn't always easy"
NO SHIT, SHERLOCK
Children don't come with an instruction manual
HOW ABOUT A REMOTE CONTROL?
"Make an effort to spend quality time together, even if it's just to go for a walk as a family, even just an hour."
RATHER THAN SADDLE THE COMMUNITY WITH YOUR PARENTAL FAILURES?
"Engage children in what you're doing, talk to your child about what's going on and ask them what they think."
TAKE THEM TO THE PUB WITH YOU, SHOW THEM ALL ABOUT KIDNEY FAILURE AND SMOKING ILLNESSES.
Praise your child. Let them know when they're doing something good, and it will encourage them to do it again.
WELL DONE FOR TERRORISING THE COMMUNITY AND SETTING FIRE TO THE BUS SHELTER, YOU MAY NOW BRING YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND HOME FOR MORE UNPROTECTED SEX.
Provide your child with engaging activities. When children have plenty of interesting things to do, they don't get bored and there are fewer problems.
HERE'S THE TELLY, THE DIAL A PIZZA NUMBER IS ON THE PAD NEAR THE PHONE, THE BEER'S IN THE FRIDGE, I CAN'T BE BOTHERED, I'M OFF TO THE PUB.
Parenting has a crucial influence on a child's behaviour
NO, YOU DON'T SAY!
"How we act around children encourages them - what we do, they see and copy."
SO, YOU'RE THE CULPRITS, I F*CKING KNEW IT!
"Rules should apply to everyone in the house - the children learn from us about things like tidying up and less swearing."
HA HA, IT JUST GETS BETTER
"Children listen to you more when you talk to them face to face instead of shouting from the other room."
OR ARE YOU JUST A TOTAL INADEQUATE THAT CAN'T EXPRESS YOURSELF? IF YOU CAN'T EXPRESS YOURSELF, HOW ABOUT NOT EXPRESSING YOUR SEXUALITY, AND NOT HAVING CHILDREN IN THE FIRST PLACE?
"Instead of shouting I ignore minor misbehaviour - it works and I am less stressed."
AND THEN MORE MAJOR MISBEHAVIOUR, AND THEN ALL BEHAVIOUR?
"I used to tell him off for silly little things, now I ignore little things unless it's going to turn into something major."
YEAH, AND NOW THEY JUST WON'T LISTEN?
"Stay calm. The calmer you are, the easier it is to calm children down."
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
Back up your instructions with appropriate consequences. Back up your words with actions such as removing a troublesome toy, withdrawing a privilege or in certain instances use a consequence such as time out.
SUCH AS? IF YOU DON'T GO TO SCHOOL YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO GET A JOB? THAT'S A BIT RICH COMING FROM SOMEONE THAT HAS SPENT THE CHILD'S LIFE ON THE DOLE.
Develop routines for your child. Routines help children learn what to do at certain times of the day, like before school or getting ready for bed.
HANG ON, ISN'T THE AGE OLD TRIED AND TESTED 'DO AS YOU F*CKING PLEASE' ROUTINE WORKING?
AU REVOIR
Monday, February 26, 2007
Songs of Praise.
Not the Nine O'Clock News was a fantastic sketch show from the 80's. Here's the 'Songs of Praise' sketch.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j2GFfpgTBt0
"The week before, Harvest Sunday, there were 3 of us, myself, the organist Mr Posnor, and a tin of Spagetti. Where were you BASTARDS then?!"
Brilliant.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j2GFfpgTBt0
"The week before, Harvest Sunday, there were 3 of us, myself, the organist Mr Posnor, and a tin of Spagetti. Where were you BASTARDS then?!"
Brilliant.
Why. Not a question, a statement.
We are who we are due to a number of influences during our upbringing. To name a few of them, those influences come from culture, religion, peers, education, television and the media, personal experience and most importantly parental influence.
We tread a fine line walking through life, being bombarded on all sides with information from various groups.
Magazines that say you will only be attractive if you have the eating habits of a hunger striker. Television pictures showing atrocities in other countries. Education telling you that a university degree is the be all and end all of life, despite thousands of new graduates being unemployed? Peers and (so called) friends influencing you to smoke, drink, drive, steal, fight and shag. Billboard sized posters outside churches telling you that a life of damnation faces non-believers.
Then we have mum and dad (not always together, or in that combination, or even there at all) putting their oar in.
Lets see what happens with the children of a mum that ran away from home, got into trouble with the police, did drugs, got pregnant, the absent father (if known), single bedroom flat, income support and living in an area of depravation?
Then we have the (so-called) middle-class parent. Their friends get a new car, we have to get a new car, their friends go to posh restaurants, we have to go. The parents do longer hours at work to suplement the income (and pay for the outgoings). Kids become latch-key and bored out of their skulls, then they rebel (peers tell them too).
Then what about the kids of lifetime criminals, people with multiple page convictions, are they going to be well fed, conversed in current affairs, socially literate and integrated, or most of all happy and content?
There are a myriad of ways that influence kids to go off the rails, but one common denominator exists. For that I would like to use Edmund Burke’s famous quote:
‘All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.’
I lay the blame of gang culture, Y.C.A. , ASBO and criminal behaviour at one door. The door of inadequate, inept, unexistant parenting.
When kids mess up or do something wrong, it needs a firm individual to stand up to them and guide them accordingly. Let kids get away with things then they grow into a world with no comprehension of discipline or morals.
Add to the mix some of the pathetic, spineless, abusive, drunken, aggressive, thieving, illiterate, emotionally-deprived, selfish parents that exist in EVERY town in the country, and it's hardly surprising that we have a problem, is it?
I found that the most effective way to punish someone, was to punish someone else. If I was caught doing something wrong, my parents would tell me off, but ground my brother's not me. The cold shoulder I got for being wrong worked better than any telling off. The armed forces use the same principle to discipline troops. If a soldier turns up late for parade, he is made to watch the full squad do press ups and run round the block, or worse still, weekend leave is cancelled for the lot of them - except the one in the wrong.
It works a treat.
I think we ought to punish the parents of wayward kids, after all, it's them that have ultimately unleashed the little sods on us in the first place!!
We tread a fine line walking through life, being bombarded on all sides with information from various groups.
Magazines that say you will only be attractive if you have the eating habits of a hunger striker. Television pictures showing atrocities in other countries. Education telling you that a university degree is the be all and end all of life, despite thousands of new graduates being unemployed? Peers and (so called) friends influencing you to smoke, drink, drive, steal, fight and shag. Billboard sized posters outside churches telling you that a life of damnation faces non-believers.
Then we have mum and dad (not always together, or in that combination, or even there at all) putting their oar in.
Lets see what happens with the children of a mum that ran away from home, got into trouble with the police, did drugs, got pregnant, the absent father (if known), single bedroom flat, income support and living in an area of depravation?
Then we have the (so-called) middle-class parent. Their friends get a new car, we have to get a new car, their friends go to posh restaurants, we have to go. The parents do longer hours at work to suplement the income (and pay for the outgoings). Kids become latch-key and bored out of their skulls, then they rebel (peers tell them too).
Then what about the kids of lifetime criminals, people with multiple page convictions, are they going to be well fed, conversed in current affairs, socially literate and integrated, or most of all happy and content?
There are a myriad of ways that influence kids to go off the rails, but one common denominator exists. For that I would like to use Edmund Burke’s famous quote:
‘All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.’
I lay the blame of gang culture, Y.C.A. , ASBO and criminal behaviour at one door. The door of inadequate, inept, unexistant parenting.
When kids mess up or do something wrong, it needs a firm individual to stand up to them and guide them accordingly. Let kids get away with things then they grow into a world with no comprehension of discipline or morals.
Add to the mix some of the pathetic, spineless, abusive, drunken, aggressive, thieving, illiterate, emotionally-deprived, selfish parents that exist in EVERY town in the country, and it's hardly surprising that we have a problem, is it?
I found that the most effective way to punish someone, was to punish someone else. If I was caught doing something wrong, my parents would tell me off, but ground my brother's not me. The cold shoulder I got for being wrong worked better than any telling off. The armed forces use the same principle to discipline troops. If a soldier turns up late for parade, he is made to watch the full squad do press ups and run round the block, or worse still, weekend leave is cancelled for the lot of them - except the one in the wrong.
It works a treat.
I think we ought to punish the parents of wayward kids, after all, it's them that have ultimately unleashed the little sods on us in the first place!!
Sunday, February 25, 2007
Will they ever learn?
I wonder how many people will be caught out by the government's new mobile phone legislation which comes into force from tomorrow?
It has been publicised for long enough, but there will allways be the ones that try to get away with it. Discretion might play a big part in the initial enforcement, but I think even the most soft hearted of officers will start issuing tickets if the message isn't getting home.
Me. I don't know. I would be a hypocrite if I said I've never used a mobile whilst driving. But I can hand on heart say that I haven't used one in the last 3 years when behind the wheel. I don't think I'll be out looking for them per se, but I will deal with them accordingly.
People that bitch about fines for speeding, seatbelts and mobiles piss me off. It is easy to avoid getting ticketed, DON'T DO IT. Yes folks, it's that simple.
If you don't want to get a fine for doing 159mph in a 30, leaving your seatbelt off and taking your chances with physics or having that very, very important gossip with Claire about your new handbag, then my advice is simple.
SLOW DOWN, CLUNK CLICK AND SHUT THE F*CK UP.
If you do want to carry on (because you know better), then feel free, just don't get on the worn out soap box in the pub and bitch about it, because you only have one person to blame.
AND WE ALL KNOW WHO THAT IS!!!
Be safe kids. Au revoir.
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